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Readers, followers, people who have stumbled upon this post and are already considering moving elsewhere:

My sincere apologies.

I have neglected my poor blog for a whole week. Not a post has been posted, not a comment moderated. I have missed several pages of Freshly Pressed posts, and too many of your own posts.

I cannot apologise enough.

I have been ill in bed and drinking copious amounts of lemon and honey tea, and feeling sorry for myself. A word of advise: don’t work with children. They have all sorts of germs.

However, I’m here to make this worse.

Hopefully, the fact that I’ve been ill is karma enough for those readers whose linguistic appetite has not been satiated. For those of you who have been refreshing your reader with fervour every few minutes and yelling when no interesting facts from Anglophonism appeared, perhaps the ability to laugh at me in my illness will satisfy you.

However, I don’t like people laughing at my expense, and a week is not a terribly long time, so I’m here to rub salt in these freshly made wounds.

The lovely Ryan Morrison has nominated me for an award.

Shucks.

The thing is, if I could nominate him right back, I would, I think I “like” every single post comic he draws, which, while it may not seem so, is heart-felt. He’s my daily giggle.

There are other wonderful blogs I shall nominate, though.

However, firstly, I have to follow some rules:

  1. Identify and show appreciation of the blogger who awarded you. (*Check*)
  2. You must add the award logo to your blog. (How do I do this???)
  3. Tell your readers 7 things about yourself.
  4. You must nominate 5-10 of your favourite bloggers for this award.
  5. Inform your nominees that you nominated them.

Having completed one, and become flabbergasted at the second, here’s the third.

This is somewhat hard, because I would like to think my followers follow me not for me but for my blog, and to satiate their overpowering interest in the English Language. So I shall make these seven facts about me, but blog related:

  1. My favourite word is perpetually. It used to be ubiquitous, but then I moved just around the corner from a restaurant called The Ubiquitous Chip, and so ubiquitous became too ubiquitous. My favourite word shall now perpetually be perpetually.
  2. My favourite book is The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver
  3. Last week I read books one and two of The Hunger Games in 3 days, and I’m now getting withdrawal symptoms because I have to wait until a friend finishes the third. I’m getting regular dreams about them, people. This is not right.
  4. My comments feed was, on Monday, flooded with comments about misplaced apostrophes. I would like to take this opportunity to plead guilty, but, if it’s an excuse, nurofen, strepsils and some disgusting French medicine have this side effect. I read it on the bottle. Side effects include: dizziness, misplaced apostrophes and other grammatical errors.
  5. Despite his poor English, and many of his views and opinions, I know all the lyrics to 90% of Eminem songs off by heart. I should be ashamed, but find that too hard.
  6. When I grow up (because when does anyone?), I want to work with autistic children, teaching them the hidden language of communication others don’t have any difficulty learning. Or I could be a mermaid. Either or.
  7. I’m slightly obsessed with Virginia Woolf, but try not to let this show in my blog. I don’t want people to think I’m intense and crazy, which I can come across as when it comes to certain things.

If anyone’s still awake by this point, I’ll move swiftly on to my nominations…

  1. Braman’s Wanderings guarantees good read every time. Interesting, well-written and leaves little to be desired.
  2. A Flock of Crows manages to word things in an intelligent, cohesive manner and
    provokes many thoughts and ideas at the same time and in each post.
  3. Le Cul Entre Les Deux Chaises is an extremely interesting blog on the cultural and linguistic differences noticed by “an American Spaniard living in France”.
  4. A Little Blog of Books and Other Stuff is worth dropping by if you’re ever looking for an idea of what to read.
  5. Suddenly Something Really Interesting is a cartoonist’s blog, which is not only well drawn and amusing but also talks about real life issues which affect us all.